Adopted is Past Tense

I have two beautiful daughters. The older is next to me as I type this and the younger is upstairs fighting the urge to give in into her nighttime sleep. They are, without question, my daughters and I am proud of them.

We share a lot of time together, we share a home, we share a love to be outside and playing, but one thing we don't share is biology. Neither of my precious girls has my eyes. Neither of them has their mother's freckles.

Both of our girls entered our family through adoption. The older was adopted a few years ago and the younger just a month ago. Even so, they are my daughters and there is no way they could be any more my daughter than they are.

Notice what I typed though: I didn't say they "are" adopted as in present tense. "Adopted" is not their identity. They "were" adopted. Past tense. Done. One day they had one heritage and identity and the next day they had a brand new heritage and identity. (In their cases, each of them came from families that wish they could have been their parents; loving and sacrificial. There was never a time in my daughter’s existence that they were unwanted, either by their birth families or our family.)

They are my daughters. They always will be. I treasure that. I treasure them.

In Galatians 4, Paul describes the relationship God the Father has with those who are his children with the metaphor of adoption. Roman adoption that Paul knew was different in many ways than ours, but that kind of adoption is a beautiful picture of how a Father brings his children into his family. One day they had a heritage and identity that was separate from the Father...excluded...alone. Then, by his grace, he adopted us into his family and into a new identity: welcomed, reconciled, dearly loved, forgiven.

All who entrust themselves by grace to Jesus are adopted into God's family. Past tense. Not a second class member of the family, but a child who is fully loved and accepted. And none of it had to be earned, but it is all given as a gift.

Galatians 4:4–7: But when the fullness of time had come, God sent forth his Son, born of woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons. And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, “Abba! Father!” So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God. (ESV)

Walking By Unaware

Yesterday, kind of on a whim, my friend and I took a walk to Capitol Hill to observe the culture of that part of our city. Not like a person would "observe" animals in a zoo, gawking and tapping on other people's (metaphorical) glass, but to be present. We wanted to see people who (generally) think very differently than us, not just do a quick drive by. There is something about walking someone else's streets to begin to understand their hearts.

It takes emotional energy to enter into an area full of people who might think me to be the enemy. Being a follower of Jesus and walking down Broadway can be intimidating because of the difference in our views of the world and that there is so much openly celebrated that I do not want to celebrate. Though the emotional weariness is real, it is worth it to see people and be with them on their terms.

That's the issue though. I am not bent towards valuing people who are different than me. I tend to be subtly prejudiced; not only making judgments (Read: "decisions") about people without knowing all of the facts in their lives, but condemning them for that I think about them. I become a blind judge and then a way-too-eager executioner. That is a human failure. One we are all born with and then our society encourages it.

While I am acting as an ignorant judge of another and then writing them off as a failure, I am missing something important. While walking down the street past the woman who smells like the streets she lives on or the man proudly wearing the Antifa symbol on his t-shirt, I can easily walk by unaware of the glory of God that they still reflect.

C.S. Lewis described who we walk by unaware in his sermon, The Weight of Glory: "There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts, civilizations - these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat. But it is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub, and exploit - immortal horrors or everlasting splendors.”

Our neighbors are made in God's image...and that means much, much more than I can understand. I can walk within feet of another person, look them in the eye, and not know the beauty of God's image that makes up their soul's DNA.*

Though we are capable of living a life of a degree of goodness and (at the same time) harboring the ability to creatively commit new, terrible forms of evil to each other, each person is inherently valuable. The poor, the sick, the weak, the mentally broken, those that destroy lives, the the unborn, the aged, and those who don't give anything to society are just as valuable as those who are high performers, wealthy, polite, young, privileged, intelligent, and well-put-together.

This "value" is nothing that we have earned. It is a very marred reflection of the ultimate Valuable One who crafted each of us to mirror to the world the beauty of his character.

So, though I know our God does not value everything we are, everything we do, and everything we create, (and is often opposed to what we produced from the overflow of our hearts) even still each person we walked by deserves not to be falsely judged and joyfully condemned. Though it is not loving to simply condone every action that comes from our wandering hearts (mine or my neighbor's) Jesus' heart is for all of us to be redeemed to our full humanity, restored fully back to his own image.

This shows the beauty of Jesus' heart: that even though as he walked our streets, smelled our smells, and saw our hearts, his love still took him to a place where he walked by us to the cross fully aware of the depth of what our failure (my prejudice included) would cost him there.

Jesus doesn't walk by us unaware. He is aware of everything we are and can make true, wise judgments based on all that we are. He can see that though we are valuable because of his image in us, we are worthy of condemnation because of how we marred that image. Even so, He did not come into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through him might be saved. (John 3:17)

*I have to note here that this does take into account the deep rebellion and damnable wickedness that we live out before we are made alive in Jesus, but it doesn't change the fact that the people we live by, walk by, work with, are still in some ways still like our God.

Roots that Drink Deeply

“Have a blessed day!”

Honestly, I was thrown off when the teenage guy serving us our fast food said these words to me. I didn’t know how to respond.

So, I responded with something profound “May you find yourself blessed by our eternal Father and his Son Jesus Christ, in the power of the Holy Spirit today, ah-men.” (Really it was going to be something awkward like “You too also have a blessed day today, also” but the server had walked away already.)

If he had handed me our lunch and said “Have a good day” I wouldn’t have given it a second thought and simply said “You too.”

“Blessed” seems to mean something different. Something deeper, reverent, otherworldly. Though the high school-aged guy didn’t think about his words nearly as much as I have, he knew it meant something more than “I hope you don’t choke on your fried food.”

So, what does blessed mean? I will answer this way, I know, but then again I don’t know. All I have are pictures, not words. A tree planted by waters whose roots constantly drink deeply of the cool water even during raging dryness. It flourishes through all circumstances. (See Jeremiah 17:7-8) Or Jesus multiplying a meager meal until not only had everyone eaten, but he gave until they were satisfied. (See John 6:11-13)

What I do know for sure is that we have often made “blessed” dryly religious rather than meaningful. We have used that word to sound spiritual rather than to have an encounter with God’s flourishing Spirit.

In Matthew 5, Jesus starts off his sermon about his coming Kingdom with the words “Blessed are the…” He is both making a promise and describing a condition of life. To be blessed is to have a life of the fullest good. To be blessed means to experience of life of flourishing instead of languishing. To be blessed means to be so connected to the person of Jesus that all of his “blessed-ness” flows into all of our lives.

Yeah, I still don’t full know what that means. All I know is that I don’t want to be left out of that.

So, have a blessed day. Have a blessed life. Have a blessed eternity. Don’t settle for less because Jesus doesn’t offer less. He welcomes us into a life with him that is not nearly meager, but defined by Jesus’ own lavish nature to love us well.

Not a "Childish" Faith

Matthew 19:14: But Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.”

Trusting like a child trusts is not an ignorant kind of trust.

Let me explain. I have noticed this when I carry my youngest daughter down the stairs or lift her up to the ceiling in our house: she trusts me. Her laugh and smile and restful posture in my arms tell me that she has confidence that I won’t let her fall.

But there is something she (thankfully) does not yet know: I am fall-able. I can fall. It is possible that I will fail her in some ways. And, though I am not proud of it, some day I will.

There is a sense that- right now- she would trust anyone who would pick her up and feed her. She doesn’t yet know the difference. She is ignorant in the best possible way to use that word. Not stupid, just not experienced.

The Inevitable Experience

It is experience that causes us to learn not to trust. The experience of being dropped, let down, failed, left in the cold, made an outsider, rejected, stolen from, used, taken advantage of. It is the experience of confidently putting ourselves in the care of someone else - not knowing that we shouldn’t trust them- and feeling of falling when we experience that they fail us.

We begin to think a new thought at that moment: I can’t rely on someone else. We begin to “grow up” at that moment and see the world as it really is. We are no longer ignorant, but we also become unwilling to trust.

When Jesus describes the heart posture that his disciples will have, he describes their attitude as like a child’s attitude. Our perspective, in some way, can be like a child’s perspective. Not silly and unchallenged, but simple and uncomplicated.

We Can Never Go Back

But it is hard, impossible even, to go back to that attitude of ignorant trust. We know too much and have experienced too much failure. We know our own failure to be trustworthy and know that everyone around us is just as fallible as we are. We can never go back.

But, I think Jesus means something different than going back to ignorance. He is not asking us to act as if we trust him while pushing down all of our experiences.

He is asking us to have to have a child-like confidence in him even though all of those experiences. He is inviting us to come to him to learn that even though we have been dropped coming down the stairs by others, he is unable to drop us. Even when those around us have made promises to love us and have broken those promises in a heart-breaking way, he is not able to break his promise to love us and hold us close.

The Invitation to Be Confident in the Trustworthy

Jesus is inviting us to come be held close, bringing all of our experiences and pain and doubt and weariness and unwillingness and say to him “I am here to trust again. Are you trustworthy?”

The rest of life is then to slowly re-learn what we lost: that we were made to rest in another’s strength and love. But, this time it will not be ignorant. This time it will be in the growing knowledge that there is one who is strong enough to carry us down the stairs or lift us up to the ceiling in such a way that we do not fear falling. There is One who is loving enough that he cannot and will not leave us in such a way that that we can laugh and smile and have a restful posture with him like we used to have before all of our experiences.

We can be a child again, but this time it isn’t ignorant. It is a child-like faith in a faithful Jesus, not a childish faith in someone unknown.

Four Little Words that Reshape our Lives

Christ. Lives. In. Me.
Think about each of those words for a moment.

Christ. The fullness of God in human flesh. All of his power, all of his glory, all of his humility, all of his love.

Lives. He is alive. He is not just a historical figure or a wish fulfillment for those who want hope in a troubled world. He is not a mere myth. Jesus himself is more alive than anyone has ever been alive...so much so that he can share his life and still be a never empty source of life.

In. Dwelling in. Abiding in. Residing in. More than geographical. Personal. Intimate.

Me. Imperfect. Stubborn. Undeserving. But, also pursued. Loved. Called a dearly loved child. Adopted as a full family member. Welcomed.

This is the neglected part of the gospel, but part of the gospel nonetheless. Misunderstood at best. Probably seemingly unexplainable. But, even then, still true. Still worth exploring together.

For those who are bought by Jesus, surrendered to his lordship, rescued from their sin, Christ lives in us.

Friend of the Unfriendable

So many people around me find Facebook engaging and a great way to keep in touch with people. (Maybe too much!) I'm not a huge fan. Though there is a lot of value in what Facebook's brand of social media can do for us, to keep up with that many friends is overwhelming to me.

But that's just it isn't it: friends on Facebook tend to be a different kind of friend. We call some of those relationships "Facebook friends" to distinguish from other kinds of friends. Maybe "acquaintances" would be better or even "connections."

Jesus has heard what people have said about him. He has heard the side-conversations of the religious leaders who do not hide their distrust of his choice of dinner companions. He has seen the skepticism (revulsion?) on their faces as he walks into the homes of the traitorous tax collectors or the degenerate sinners. Jesus is not unaware of what his friendships communicate to those who don't yet understand his heart.

They call Jesus a "friend of tax collectors and sinners." (see Luke 7:34) Jesus' detractors spoke those words as something shameful, something that should be run from or hidden from the view of polite society. It is easy to see that Jesus doesn't dispute who he befriends, but he wears it proudly.

In spending time meditating on Jesus as a friend of sinners this week, I recognized that I safely and comfortably redefine Jesus' heart by misreading the words of the text. If I am honest, I almost want the text to say "Jesus is a Facebook friend of sinners" or "Jesus is an acquaintance/colleague of sinners." That's safe, manageable, and distant.

But, Jesus is a friend of sinners. He gets in deeper. Stays longer. Asks more meaningful questions. Gives more meaningful heart-answers. He wants to be all the friend that we need, and more of a friend than we would safely choose.

Though he knows the depths of our hearts- knows the corruption, knows the deceit, knows the brokenness, knows the pain- he is unashamed and unafraid to invite us to be his friend. We would never fully entrust ourselves to someone who only knew part of us, but we can freely entrust ourselves to One who knows us fully and wants to have dinner with us anyway.

So Jesus doesn't walk into anyone's home hiding his face in shame. He is not concerned about the way his actions are perceived. Jesus freely, willingly, joyfully, hopefully, comes to us with his heart-felt invitation to more-than-Facebook-friendship, but to a life of heart transforming relationship that our hearts long for.

What Freedom Looks Like: Welcome

“I can do what I want! It is a free country!”

Maybe you are like me and you have said those words before. Most of the time I said it on the playground at school when someone told me I couldn’t get on “their” swing they were saving or in my classroom when my teacher told me to do something I didn’t want to do. (What I said to the teacher was almost always courageously to myself)

We love freedom and think that we are fully free. But what does freedom look like? Are we fully free? If so, what does that look like?

A person who has been unfree (enslaved) all of their life doesn’t understand what freedom is. They have just seen freedom from the outside.

In the second chapter of Galatians, Paul describes what his freedom looked like. Freedom from the slavery of being captive to the whims of “influential people” and free to impartially welcome people into relationship no matter Who they are or where they come from. Free, like Jesus, to be a friend of sinners.

Jesus is inviting us to understand his freedom from the inside. He is inviting us from a life of serving our sin and trying (with all of our might) to minimize sin through following all the rules to a life where sin isn’t our master, but we master our sin through the power of the Spirit living- powerfully- in us.

Join us Sunday evening as we walk through these things together, following a kind Master whose heart is fully free.

Interdependence

Prayerfully consider something with me: consider having someone over.

We see the COVID numbers going up again and it looks like the time in which we have to shelter-in-place is extending. All of us are weary of thinking about the virus, being vigilant to wear a mask and wash our hands, and wondering when we might get to some sort of "normal."

I am feeling it now as much as I ever have.

Though we want to listen to their counsel, we didn't pause meeting together solely because our governors mandated it. The real reason is because we are following Jesus and trusting in his command to "love [our] neighbors as ourselves." At the end of all of this, what will matter is how our lives answered the question: "did we express how we treasure Jesus by trusting his wisdom and loving those around us?"

With that being said, following the guidelines of the authorities the Lord has put in place to govern us, there is room to gather in small groups-in person.

So, for our Sunday-night gathering (and for any day of the week gathering) prayerfully consider meeting in small groups. Start slow. Be wise.

There is faith-filled caution. You can act in faith and still not choose to meet in person with others. No one will think less of you in whatever you choose to do. None of us has ever had to live through times like these before. We are all novices and all growing through it.

We were made in God's image to be in relationship with others. We need each other. We were made for soul-enriching, heart-shaping, gospel-saturated community created and sustained by the Spirit of God. On this July 4th, we celebrate not only our freedom to be independent from unjust tyranny, but the freedom in interdependence in relationship with one another.

Prayerfully consider inviting someone over. In all that you do, do it in love. In all that you do, do it in confidence in the heart of our God who wants to draw you more and more into relationship with himself.

You are the Beloved.

Astonished

In his book, Just Mercy, Bryan Stevenson tells a story about a defining moment in his life- the first time he met a man on death row. Henry was about the same age as Bryan at the time (early 20's) and was sentenced to death...a death that lingered in front of him though he did not know when it would come.

As a representative of the Southern Prisoners Defense Committee, Bryan came to meet Henry for one reason: to give him the simple message that he would not die in the next year.

Henry's response was one of great relief. Henry didn't see his wife or children for a time because he didn't want them to come to visit when he had an execution date- he was fearful and ashamed to see them in that way. Bryan's simple message freed Henry from the shame he was carrying.

As Bryan tells the story in his book, it says he was "astonished" that Henry responded in the way he did. The message meant something. The message changed Henry. The message gave Henry hope because he was affected by the words.

When we hear "good news" it affects us. For Henry, he knew he had more time and he could live some sort of life again.The hope he found was a relief from the burden of unknowing that he lived with day to day. We live off of good news. We need good news to speak to the deepest places of burden and hopelessness that we feel, or hide from ourselves.

It is because of the value of good news ('the gospel") that we can understand why Paul was astonished in another way: because the Galatians had deserted both the message and the One whom the message was about so quickly. Paul quickly challenged the Galatians to remember and return to the simple message that they had once embraced, but had abandoned to their own loss.

The message matters. The message is worth fighting for. The message is worth loving for. The message gives hope to those who know their own need. The message points clearly to the One we need the most.

Paul was astonished because the Galatians weren't astonished and he wanted to point them back to their heart's true home in Jesus.

How do we need to hear the good news again? Why have we wandered away, deserting him who called us? What is is about "the gospel" that changes everything for us?

The Kingdom of God in the Kingdom of CHOP

“…it is possible to unknowingly participate in the Kingdom of God before acknowledging the value of its Source: the King”- Jeff Christopherson

I am writing to you because I need to. This is as much for me to process what I have seen in the last few days as much as it is to share with you. There is much to grieve in hat has happened in our cities over the last 2-3 weeks and there is much that gives us hope.

In our city, COVID is taking a back burner to CHOP. CHOP (Capitol Hill Occupied Protest) has been the subject of a lot of national conversation and local confusion. There is a lot being said right now- much of it inaccurate and driven by differing agendas- but there is one indisputable fact for those of us in Seattle who are followers of Jesus: we are to be peacemakers where we live. That includes CHOP.

That truth led me to go to the Capitol Hill area of our city and be present to pray and to observe. I was very unwilling at first, but compelled by Jesus’ heart for the people of our city. His kind of love always seeks understanding and only his heart of love will ever compel us to act on the understanding.

With the bright, freshly painted graffiti covering (and re-covering) every concrete wall in the area, it is easy to know when you have entered into the Protest area. Tents lived in by the protestors cover the ground usually empty except for a small group of people living homeless. Discussions are happening all over the grounds and it has a festival-like atmosphere. But, there are printed and painted signs stating “Remember why we are here” to remind the protestors that they have a purpose, a message to communicate to those who are listening.

In order to deescalate a tense situation, the police left the area a few days ago and left it to the protestors on the other side of the barricade. Since that time, the people of what was called CHAZ -and is now called CHOP- claimed victory. They call it de-colonization of Seattle…the beginning of a greater movement. Since that day, people are living their lives at Cal Anderson park and the adjacent streets, creating art and writing poetry that communicates their message. Though we can all agree that the lives of people of color are valuable, that is not the only message loudly and forcefully proclaimed.

I will let my pictures share more clearly than I can, but I want to communicate what I saw. What I saw is a deep, put-your-life-on-the-line desire for what can only be called “revolution.” Revolution is more than reform, it is tearing down what is old and destructive (in their perception) and rebuilding something in its place. The colorful language does not water their message down. CHOP wants to communicate that black lives are unique and valuable and also that the capitalist system needs to be undercut and, at least metaphorically, burned down.

Even though our city is tech-oriented and strives to be the leader in a new era of capitalism, there are still influential groups of people who think it should all go. All of it. Now.

When the Lord told Jeremiah to write a letter to exiles in Babylon and for them to seek the “peace” of the city, he meant a city as confused and corrupt and rebellious as our own. The God of Peace, our God who makes peace, wants his people to love the people of our city by creating truthful, substantive peace.

It is this “peace” (wholeness, fullness, “rightness”) that our neighbors in CHOP believe they are working towards. In my second visit last night, my friend Adam and I got to speak with a couple- AR and JN- from Oregon who drove 4 plus hours to protest in solidarity with CHOP. They and their children are living in tents over the next couple of days, ready to take rubber bullets to the chest if they need to. I asked AR what drove him there (other than his Subaru)…what drives him to all of the protests he takes his family to. AR said that he hates the “world system” that oppresses people and he wants to take a stand. He wants to teach his kids what matters. We got to talk to AR and JN for around 2 hours on the grass in CHOP, hearing their story. All the while, we are listening for connection points to the gospel. (We did get to share about Jesus with them, briefly, but as soon as we started it was obvious they didn’t want to hear anything different than what they already believe, nor really discuss it.)

What I noticed about AR and JN- who are very clearly not believers and who are very openly following a mindset that is unquestionably anti-Christ- is that they, being made in God’s image, have a longing to see the world be “right.” They would fight for the world to be “right.” Though I asked him what that meant, he couldn’t explain it, but he would know it when he saw it. He wanted to make it happen by putting his body on the frontlines of issues he sees as “unjust” wherever that might be in the country. He sacrifices greatly for his cause because he wants to pass on what matters to him to the next generation so they will join in the revolution.

He and Jen are what Jeff Christopherson describes as “kingdom seekers”: those who do not have faith in Jesus, but seem to be (very imperfectly) seeking the Kingdom that Jesus is bringing. They want the beauty of a loving and just world, just without a Loving and Just King to rule their hearts. Of course there is no transformed Kingdom without the Transforming King shaping the hearts of his people, but the “kingdom seeker” still reflect the image of God in such a way that they want to create a new society. Unfortunately, it is not by the power of the Spirit, but by the power of a selfish will and an “I’m on the right side of history, why aren’t you” mentality.

That is what I love (and fear) about the people of our city: that people are passionate for a purpose. They feel that the world isn’t right and want to do something about it, even if they are (knowingly or unknowingly) throwing more fuel on the fire of personal prejudice and other injustices. Though there is so much to grieve, there is also so many ways to hope!

What if the passion the people of CHOP have for justice would be transformed and remade? What if they surrendered to Jesus as king of their lives so they could be a part of the eternal movement that is dependent on God’s Spirit and not the fervor of Marxist ideology?

What if the Spirit called AR to faith in Jesus and AR didn’t spend his life any longer looking for rubber bullets to take on, but would treasure his King enough to put his life on the line among an unreached people group…and his kid’s faith would grow too?

Would you pray for the people of our city? Would you pray that Jesus’ Church would seek real peace among our people? Would you pray that we would have a prophetic voice among our not-yet-believing neighbors that is both truth-filled and full of grace like Jesus himself is?

Celebrating the Marriage of Ashlyn and Colin: A Beautifully Different Love

This is the message that I (gave) at the wedding ceremony of Colin and Ashlyn Smith, Saturday June 20, 2020:

Ephesians 5:1-2
Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

You came because this a day where we celebrate love, specifically the love God has given to Colin and Ashlyn for each other.

What you see in them (even imperfectly) is a beautifully different kind of love.

Love in Real Life: (Live a life of love)

This passage is what God is saying to Colin and Ashlyn today. This is what God is saying to us today. Live a life of love. Love should be the defining motivation of our lives. That is a beautiful sentiment, but it gets real when laundry has to be done or we are pressured to turn in a project that is over due or that talkative friend of ours wants to come over and unload his day on us.

Jesus’ invitation is to live a lifestyle of love. That includes getting laundry done and being hospitable to chatty friends. Love is only real if it is strong enough to be real in the gritty and mundane.

Did you know the purpose of marriage, the meaning of marriage written into the DNA of the marital relationship is more than companionship, more than spending our lives with our best friend, more than romantic love, and more than creating a new family? All of those are beautiful things that God dreamed up for us, but the main purpose of marriage is to picture love. To describe love with our way of life. The purpose of marriage is a dramatization of love lived out in the real life of laundry and bills and unexpected trips to the grocery store to pick up diapers.

Living a life of love means that love defines everything we do in life. It also means that your marriage and our lives paint a picture of love for the world around us that longs to know what real love is.

How We Talk about Love: “as Christ loved us”

The kind of love described here is beautifully different than we expect. We expect greeting card sentimentality, but we find that what we get strong and enduring love. The “love” described here is “more” than we expect and “deeper” than is comfortable.

Everyone we meet will probably have a different definition of love. Love is the feeling we felt after the latest blockbuster movie we got to watch. We use the word love for our favorite foods and our favorite restaurants, and the newest app. We also use it to describe marriage, but we know they mean different things.

The type of love described here is beautifully different than we expect…and defined by the life of Jesus Christ.

We walk in love AS Christ loved us and gave himself up for us. In the same way. Or better still, we live a life of love with the very same love a Jesus loved us with. To understand his love we must start to understand ourselves as he knows us.

Let’s start with the “us” because we know us better than anyone. He died for us…he gave himself up for us. There is a hard truth in this.

Maybe your first thought is like mine was: the thought of deserving love. We talk about people “deserving” love. Our friend “deserves” a fairy tale romance. She worked hard and sacrificed, she deserves love in her life now. We talk about deserving love, but almost no one feels deserving of love. Love that really loves us as we are, where we are, in our strengths and our failures.

Every person in the world was uniquely made in God’ image and is deserving of the dignity that comes from that, but somehow we all feel like we do not deserve love…especially not this full, deep, pervasive love.

We feel that for a reason…hundreds of reasons in fact. We know our own failures. We feel our own guilt. More than that, we know we are bent toward failure. Though we try to push it down and explain it away, it lingers.

Here is the truth, we don’t deserve love.

The bible says that every person fails people, fails themselves, but most importantly fails God. We reject God with our heart and actions. This is called sin. It is the reality of every heart and it is the reason we feel guilty..because we are guilty.

Because to this, the Bible says we are “dead in our trespasses and sins.” Dead. Not just imperfect, but dead…disconnected from the God we were made to relate to…the one our heart longs for…No matter where we look for it, we don’t have the spiritual life we know we are want because we are not connected to the source of that spiritual life.

We cannot try to deny the truth of who we are and pretend we have it all together. As long as we work to think of ourselves as good enough to deserve love we will miss the love Jesus offers.

The hope is that we can embrace that hard truth.

We can embrace the truth because that isn’t the end of the story.

Love Defined: Jesus Gave Himself Up For Us
Though everyone has their own perspective of what love is. This passage says that Jesus defines it for us. This passage points to Jesus’ love as fully, unquestioningly expressed when he submitted himself to the 1st century roman death penalty: a cross

He doesn’t give us a cold, dictionary definition alone: he demonstrates love. His life and his words painted a picture of what full love really is.

Notice, this says something revolutionary about the deepest form of love: as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

This is MORE love. This is full love.

Jesus died on a Roman cross to reveal the extent of his love. To show that a person who loves joyfully gives of herself or himself even to the point of giving away all they have. This is the heart of love.

It says he gave himself up FOR US. For people who do not deserve love. For people who have earned nothing but rejection. Jesus received the death we deserve in order to give us the life he deserves. Jesus expressed his love through his death by taking our place, taking on our guilt and punishment, and taking it on himself so we don’t have to bear that burden.

Even when we are unlovable…he moves to us to show his love.

This is no merely sentimental love. It is a full love. It is a passionate love. And it is a welcoming love. A “I’m going to stick by you no matter what “ love.

This is not a love that seeks selfish goals, but seeks to do what is best for another.

This is the kind of love that never fails even when someone fails us.

This is a forgiving love. The kind of love that willfully chooses not to hold someone’s sin against them.

This is not a blind love that pretends that the other person is perfect, but longs to see the one they love grow in their faults….and works to support them.

This is the kind of love that is not a duty-filled “I was told to love you” kind of love, but a free, full, “I wouldn’t do anything else but give myself for you” kind of love

This is there kind of love that wants the best for the one they love, at any cost.

This is the kind of love that chases out fear and the selfish desire to always have it our way, which creates trust in the one who is loved.

This is the love that Jesus expressed for us at the cross…and the kind he expresses now.

Jesus love makes those who haven’t earned it, haven’t done it all right, welcomed as if they had. He makes an alienated outsider into a beloved child.

We do not deserve love, but Jesus love is so strong he gives it to those who don’t deserve it and will freely receive it.

In a similar way that you are entrusting your lives to each other today, God is inviting all of us to entrust ourselves to him. To receive a love too big for us…and that is a free gift.

Colin and Ashlyn:
Love is anything but safe. Comforting, yes. But not safe. Giving your heart away to someone is never safe. Entrusting yourself to another always makes us vulnerable.

In his book, the Four Loves C.S. Lewis says:
“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.”

You two are expressing love today that is willing to trust, willing to be vulnerable, willing to give yourself for the other freely and joyfully.

Your statement of love that you are expressing today is “living a life of love” in a similar way to how Jesus demonstrates his love to us.

Your commitment today and your married relationship that starts today are a living picture, a meaningful message, of the kind of love that Jesus extends to all of us. Your life will demonstrate the heart of Jesus.

Love is different than we expect and more than we are comfortable with.

It is a beautiful and different love because it is Jesus’ love.

The Root

very once in a while as I look in our small backyard I notice a green, snake-like vine that is forcing itself between the slates of our fence. If I am not vigilant, it will slowly, but violently push through into our yard. Then, I have to deal with it because this particular vine is a wild blackberry vine...it brings its thorns with it as it invades our space.

So I walk to the fence, cut it, and throw it back where it came from. "Done!" I proclaim and walk away confidently.

Then two weeks later, two vines start coming through the slats in our fence. Each as determined and damaging as the first. After I cut them and cry "done!" I go back to our house a little less confident that it really is done.

Then two weeks later, the familiar vine creeps through our fence again, unaware and disobeying my decree that it as "done."

The truth is, though I cut the branch with skill and precision, I wasn't paying attention to what causes the vine to grow. When I looked over the fence to what I could not see I was awakened to the reality that the problem is much deeper that I thought. The vine was connect to a quietly swirling mass of vines. That mass of vines was protecting itself and growing quickly in many directions...affecting all of the other plants and fences around it.

And somewhere, deep within the dense mass of thorny blackberry vines, is the the part where the plant gets it nutrients: its root. On my toes, looking over my fence, I cannot see the root. It is buried. It is deep. It is protected. It would be painful- exposing even- to get to the source of my vine problem.

Frankly, it is easier just to cut the vines back every couple of weeks. So, at this moment, the vine exists and grows on the other side of a fence I can't see through. Easily looked over until it bothers me a little.

So it is with prejudice and injustice when we deny the root of the problem.

The root is not systemic as many would have us believe. That is a vine coming from the root, but not the root itself. Reshape the system, undercut the institutions that are built on prejudice or have prejudice intertwined within its DNA and it will seem to die. But, slowly, while we sleep it will come back and form new systems and new institutions. Burn it down and it will rebuild right on the other side of our fence.

The root is something that few want to look at. It is deeper than is comfortable for us and we protect the root from exposure. The root of all prejudice and injustice is our own desire to justify ourselves by putting down another. "I am not perfect, but at least I am not as bad as________________." To justify ourselves we have to create a picture of ourselves in our mind that is better than someone else: prejudice. Pre-judging someone by what they look like, what they sound like, what they act like and then declaring them "not as good" as ourselves.

Or another way to say it...to get to the heart of it all...is to say this is sin. The pride that overwhelms us and controls us so that we will do whatever we can to protect our fragile selves, even demean someone else.

If the root of pride is not uprooted, then the proverbial vines will still creep through our proverbial fences.

The pride of prejudice (and injustice that follows) will only ever be ended when the root is uprooted. That is painful, but that is what Jesus died to do for us. He uproots our pride to plant a new kind of heart. A heart free from self-promotion at someone else’s expense. A heart free to love another with joy even to the point of sacrifice. A heart that is free to create new systems and institutions that will cause people to flourish.

Lament

Lament: Crucifying a Piece of Our Own Heart

Watching the video timeline of what happened in the Powderhorn area in Minneapolis last week, I was stunned silent. There are few times in my life that I have felt that way, but watching how the last few minutes of George Floyd’s life played out, I was so overwhelmed that I couldn’t process it. Should I be mad? Should I be tearful? I couldn’t express anything. I just sat there in silence, unaware that my mouth was open.

Like so many others, I tried to hold on to the idea that this man’s life ended in a demeaning and unjust way on May 25, 2020. George Floyd should not have been killed. The world shouldn’t have to hear another story like Mr. Floyd’s. The world should never have to carry the weight of this kind of injustice.

Not only is this kind of injustice is real. It is also common.

It is the kind of common and pervasive that I, honestly, do not want to deal with. This kind of injustice has affected the African American community uniquely and to a degree that no community should have to bear.

Mere Activism is Never (Deep) Enough

The only way to deal with systematic and personal injustice is to go deeper than we are willing to go on our own…not merely social action. There is something deeper within us all. Along with the real loss of a man who was crafted purposefully in God’s image (which is grievous enough) what we find in the hidden places of our hearts should cause us to lament.

Living in the Soviet Union during the reign of Joseph Stalin, Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn lived as a citizen and an outspoken critic of the country and system he lived in. His conviction eventually led him to incarceration in one of the Soviet’s infamous gulags. Solzhenitsyn was a man who looked into the face of real evil and injustice and wrestled with the underlying causes. Responding to questions about where evil comes from in his book, The Gulag Archipelago, Solzhenitsyn wrote words that are so true that we may not want to hear them:

If only there were evil people somewhere insidiously committing evil deeds, and it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them. But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?

It is simple to say evil comes from “out there” or “in those people.” Too simple and too safe. It takes courage to say the evil in society starts with the evil in me. That courage is a gift from God. (2 Timothy 2:25)

There is a lot I Don’t Understand, but Something I Do

I am a white man sitting in a predominately anglo area of Seattle. My life experience is not the same at all of those who are protesting the injustice. It makes me angry, but not in the same way and with the same depth as those who now come to expect that kind of treatment. Though I want to fully understand, I honestly don’t.

But, I do understand me. I do understand how easy it is for me to look down on another person because they are different than me. A specific ethnicity or culture do not make a big difference to me. I am color blind in the way that I can be self-righteous towards people. (Please read that again…that’s not a complement to myself)

Because my understanding of my bentness towards looking down on others and using my “power” to abuse others (let’s call that “self-righteousness” like Jesus does), I recognize that I am not alone in that. It isn’t a trait limited to a political persuasion or ethnicity, it is a human problem. As many have said before me, It is the default mode of every human heart and works out in many insidious and sinful ways.

Sin is the root of the reason why we would rather sacrifice someone for our own good rather than giving ourselves- joyfully- for one another. For the sin of racism (both personal and systemic) to be destroyed so must that piece of our hearts that fuels it.

”Repent” is a Reconciling Word
The lament will also lead us to repent. We need to repent of our self-righteousness. We need to let the God who knows our hearts, expose the secrets of our hearts. This is true, not so we will hang our heads in guilt and shame, but that we might re-formed (really “re-created”) towards sacrificing for our neighbors rather than sacrificing them for our wants.

We don’t want to hear the answers. God’s answer will painfully rend our hearts. Being exposed will shine light on that piece of our hearts that we want to hide. It will challenge the perception of “goodness” that we long for for ourselves- our pride in having it together- and humble us.

A lamenting heart that sees the injustice it can create is by far more freeing and transformative than a token gesture on social media.

If I sound self-righteous in my tone, please forgive me. I am self-righteous. Jesus is saving me from my own desire to look down on others so I feel better about myself. That is why I write this. I need to repent. I want to lament my own sin…taking out the plank in my own eye so I can be free to lovingly, humbly, and boldly help my brother with his.

Repentance Means Saying “Maybe Its Me”

I want our first action to be to ask "Could I really be part of the problem?" That's hard because it is exposing. I'm grieving that exposure myself right now because I know how easy it is for me to look at flaws in others to make myself feel better. No one really wants to see what is really in their heart. But, systemic racism will only end through people answering "yes" to the question above and also finding hope that Jesus transforms a selfish heart into a self-less heart like His own.

If you have read this far would you lament with me? Lament the real injustices and the root causes of it: no one is righteous, no not one (Romans 3:10)

It doesn’t have to be loud and overt. It shouldn’t be public or put on. Just let the Spirit of God work in our hearts to help us to grieve what he grieves, hate what he abhors, and (at the same time) live out the times of refreshing he promised. (Acts 3:20)

There will be a time when we will not have curfews every night and there won’t be as many protest posters carried on our streets, but the deep, heart issues will remain. Let’s grieve them then, too.

Lament for a Purpose

Lament in order to love our neighbors as ourselves.

Lament in order that the world might see (and experience) the freedom that comes through repentance and faith in Jesus.

In order that the God whose image every human being bears might be known and treasured. Treasured as the One who allowed his own loving heart to be rent on an unjust cross to pay our penalty for our injustices. (Romans 6:23)

Please lament with me. Grieve with me what God’s Spirit grieves. Pray with me for a broken heart over sin. Not just “their” sin, but our own sin. That is the beginning of severing the root of racism.

"I Did it [His] Way"

In 1974, Frank Sinatra stood in front of a large crowd in Madison Square Garden and told his loyal fans that they were about to "do the national anthem, but you needn't rise." After just a few notes played and two words sung ("And now...") the crowd cheered at a song they recognized. Not "O Say Can You see," but these words:

And now the end is near and so I face the final curtain
My friend I'll say it clear, I'll state my case of which I'm certain
I've lived a life that's full, I traveled each and every highway
And more, much more than this, I did it my way.

The "national anthem." One we sing with fanfare and patriotic gusto. The other we live with (almost) unchecked resolve. "I am going to live my way" is the heart's cry for many and might be the greatest unquestioned mission statement of most of those who call themselves "Americans."

Jesus sees something different, though. He sees something different than we do about our desire to live it our way. He sees into our own lostness that comes from "doing it our way." Matthew says:

Matthew 9:36: ”When he saw the crowds, he had compassion for them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.”

In the crowds of individual people who he walked among who were each (though not American) doing it their way, he looked past the pride and bravado and saw weariness and scatteredness. Jesus still looks at all of the crowds and (with compassion) sees how our self-guidance leads us to places we wouldn't go if we knew where we were really going...and knew what we were losing by not following Jesus' way.

Jesus' invitation to us is to his abundant life, but that abundant life never comes from living merely our own way...following our own course. Abundant life comes from turning our backs on our own selfish ways and following the One who welcomes us into his life...to being with the One who knows where the "life that's full" really is.

Stuffed with Stuff

Adrienne was watching the show "Hoarders" last week while feeding our youngest. I had never seen the show before, but knew what it was and was intrigued with the people who live that way. The questions of "how" and "why" grabbed my attention enough to stop what I was doing to stop and watch.

It took 2-3 minutes for me to walk out of the room, full of an unexpected anxiety. There was a tension in me as I watched a man climbing over pizza boxes on the stairs to get to his second floor: I both like "stuff" and cannot handle "stuff." I felt over stuffed thinking about a life of accumulation and had to walk away. But, I still like my things.

In Luke chapter 12, Jesus speaks to the crowd with words that may seem too personal when he says "Take care, and be on your guard against all covetousness, for one's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions." Now, I don't know what makes other people hoard, but I know what makes me want more and more stuff; Jesus calls it covetousness and he tells us to be vigilant against covetousness.

Why? Because stuff is bad. No, because it isn't where abundant life is. Living a life to obtain and hold on to and to treasure possessions stuffs us full so that we aren't hungry for Jesus' abundant life.

There is a remedy to that longing. A spiritual practice (discipline) that frees us from our hunger after stuff and the security we find in having stuff: giving.

Are we free to be generous? Do we have so much of Jesus' abundant life that we abundantly give of ourselves like he does?

Or are we stuffed full of stuff that we are stuck?

Fasting to be Filled

After a surprisingly overfull week, I (Wes) sit writing this on Saturday morning knowing I want to write something to you. Next to me is my (now) daily bowl of oatmeal for breakfast with the luxury of blueberries to sweeten the meal. I keep pausing in my writing so I can eat what is in front of me...to get the sweet spot of just exactly the right temperature with every bite before it cools off.

I like to eat and I like to be full. That is why fasting doesn't make sense to me at first. Why would a person deny themselves something that is so necessary? Why would someone like me risk the chance of being empty and (I admit it) hangry by abstaining from food?

We live in a "follow all of your desires" world. To abstain from anything we might want seems strange to most. In the search for the most abundant type of life, we tend to consume to find fulfillment, devouring whatever food or entertainment is easily accessible. We long to be full, but can't seem to feed ourselves enough to escape our emptiness.

Our first thought when we think of "fasting" is being empty, but Jesus fasted to be filled. Talking to his disciples as they returned to him after getting his food, Jesus didn't grasp desperately for what they brought him, but he told them that he had "food that they didn't know about." What is this food? What is this fullness?

Fasting is not about merely choosing to be empty but to be more full of what really fills us. Oatmeal is filling for a couple of hours, but we were made for more.

Let's celebrate together that our God is a God who emptied himself so that we can enjoy him who is to us like a soul feast of the richest foods.

Festival Joy Doesn't Need a Festival

Our three month old just did something dramatic and profound. I don't want to be one of those out of touch "the whole world revolves around what my child just did" dads, but I have to tell you about it. I just have to!

She smiled at me when I said good morning to her.

It is hard not to smile when an infant smiles. It seems like everything else that is on our minds melts away when she looks into our eyes and notices (happily) that we are there. There is something that wells up in us, and takes over everything else we are feeling, and we smile back at her!

It is hard not to smile back at her.

Remember what Dallas Willard said: "True Christlikeness, true companionship with Christ, comes at the point where it is hard not to respond as he would." (Spirit of the Disciplines, 8)

One thing that is startling about Jesus is that he was invited to the party. He was welcomed to weddings and to dinner parties. Oftentimes, when he left a people or a town there was "much rejoicing." (Think of a once-lame man going from standing for the first time in his life to leaping and praising God!) The Man of Sorrows also lived in joy!

Though we are living in days where parties are not welcomed and the uncertainty in our lives can weigh our hearts down, we can follow Jesus' lead into celebration joy. Though it is a deliberate act on our part to celebrate, it flows from Jesus' deliberate heart to share his joy with us!

We Are Together in This...for Now

Fellowship

Maybe you have noticed what I (Wes) have noticed. There are a lot of signs that say "we are in this together" showing up around us. At the grocery store, at the park, on ads that pop up on news websites. The threat of the virus does bring us together, in a sense. Every person and every culture in the world is more on the same level than we ever have been in our lifetime.

But (and sadly, I have to write that word), even a pandemic is not enough for us to really come together. Though we are all having similar experiences (similar and not nearly the same), the reasons we normally don't all come together are still there, hidden beneath the "oneness" we are experiencing now.

We all long for what the Bible calls "fellowship." People gather in tribes whether in the jungles of Asia or the wildlands of urban Seattle. People gravitate to others who are like-hearted and like minded. Though I risk over-simplifying here, the reality is that we desire to be connected with people because we are crafted into the image of our God who is, at his core, relational. Personal. Being re-la-tive is written into the DNA of his soul.

"We are together"...for now. But what will keep us together in a way where our hearts are engaged with one another? What has to change (in us?) for us to have to have real, abiding, committed, joyful relationships that not only last, but also stand up during trials like a global pandemic or (maybe worse) a grumpy day?

Join us this Sunday evening (virtually) as we explore the deepest longing of the human soul together and how Jesus himself and his good news what what we need to experience the relatedness we desperately look for.

The Model Pray-er

I have so many questions about prayer.

If God already knows what we need then why does he ask us to pray? (He knows better than we know!)

Do I have to say the right words for him to answer? (I don't know what those words are!)

Do I have to pray with a pure heart for him to pay attention? (I am always in trouble if that is true!)

Those are the philosophical questions...the questions I sometimes ask to cover up my real heart questions. The questions that keep me from praying sometimes:
Does he want to hear what I have to say?
Why doesn't he come through for me when I need him to?!
Does he pay attention to me at all?
Is he even there?

Prayer is often a mystery to us, but it becomes less of a mystery when we pause to look into Jesus praying. There are preciously few times when we get to listen in on what he says, but when we do they are packed with meaning. Sometimes, he prays a lot of words (see John 17) and sometimes he says very little ("Father, forgive them for they do not know what they do").

But every time he prays we can learn from the model Pray-er. We don't learn "12 steps to a better praying you" or techniques to twist God's arm into giving us what we want. What we learn from the model Pray-er is that prayer is the overflow of a relationship, with all a relationship's ups and downs and imprecise messiness.

Prayer is the sign of a relationship God is inviting us into, not the work that creates it.

Pause and Pray

[At random times I will send out reflections on who God is and we see Him doing among us. This is the third of those random musings.]

I feel like I often have just enough words to make it through the day, and no more than that. Because of that, I want them to be meaningful.

Maybe, like me, its not always time that keeps us from praying, but the words. Sometimes we are concerned with praying the right words and the right tone and the right attitude.

My encouragement here is the same is it is on the video. Pause. And while you pause, pray.

Pray because Jesus taught us to, commanded us to, but also pray because you have a Father that wants to hear even your imperfect, broken, stumbling, (and sometimes) badly motivated words.

Pause and pray. Even it it is just a few words, like "please help," or "why, Father" or "I love you."

See the video linked below. More soon.

Wes

Click Here to Watch the Video on Vimeo